Haunted Mannequins

“She Speaks for the Silent–and Also for a Discount on Corduroy.”

Employees at Second Glance Thrift in Dunsberry, Maine are reconsidering their life choices after a mannequin named Glenda–dressed in a 1984 bridesmaid gown–was spotted blinking, rotating 17 degrees counterclockwise, and mouthing “yes” during a debate about who should run the bake sale committee.

“I thought it was a prank,” said cashier Robin. “Then she winked and my knee gave out.”

Since the incident, Glenda has become a local fixture. Citizens ask her for advice, confessions, and lotto numbers. Some claim she responds by subtly tilting her plastic head or raising a finger in judgment.

Psychic medium Leandra Moon offered a reading: “She’s channeling Dolores, a disgruntled seamstress who died in 1991 while sewing a cursed shoulder pad.”

Glenda has “appointed” two town council members via cold stare and allegedly stopped a wedding by toppling over during the “do you take this man” portion.

The thrift store has capitalized by launching merch: “Glenda Knows” t-shirts, votive candles, and a local blend of coffee called *The Blink Roast.*

City Hall now reserves a seat for her at budget meetings. Her opinions are read by interns using Ouija boards and gentle guesswork.

Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.


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Haunted Mannequins – Thrift Store Mannequin Blinks Twice, Becomes Town’s Unofficial Mayor and Spirit Medium – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C.,… – bohiney.com
Haunted Mannequins - Thrift Store Mannequin Blinks Twice, Becomes Town's Unofficial Mayor and Spirit Medium
BOHINEY SATIRE – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon of the new Bohiney.com headquarters located inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C. … Haunted Mannequins
BOHINEY SATIRE - A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C., drawn in a ch... - bohiney.com
BOHINEY SATIRE – Haunted Mannequins – Thrift Store Mannequin Blinks Twice, Becomes Town’s Unofficial Mayor and Spirit Medium

By Jessi Klein

Jessi Klein was born in Houston, Texas, where sarcasm is considered a local sport right after football and brisket competitions. She later packed her humor into a suitcase and carried it to Columbia University, graduating with a degree in English that she has since used to roast everyone from network executives to nosy neighbors. A stand-up comedian with a knack for dissecting modern life’s awkward contradictions, Klein has written and produced for some of the sharpest comedy shows on television, blending her Lone Star roots with big-city satire. At Bohiney.com, she thrives as both a satirical journalist and cultural commentator, skewering politics, relationships, and consumer culture with the precision of a surgeon wielding a rubber chicken. Her comedy straddles irony and absurdity, always leaving audiences laughing while secretly nodding in agreement. With Texan grit and Ivy League wit, Klein’s EEAT bio writes itself.