Bohiney News

[Verse 1] She wasn’t raised in Malibu, no shiny pink Corvette, Her first ride was a tractor, and she hasn’t looked back

DOJ Strikes Back: Maryland Judges Sued for Holding Up America’s Deportation Pipeline “Judicial obstructionism ends now”—AG Bondi announces from secure room In

The 15 Wildly Interesting Theories That Scientists Still Can’t Prove—Because They’re Too Busy Playing Wordle A Deep Dive into the Most

Bill Gates Accidentally Drops Out of Billionaire Club After Excessive Philanthropy—Steve Ballmer Beats Him Using Yelling and Microsoft Stock “I gave

“Operation Excalibur: Why the Federal Government Invaded a Los Angeles Park (With Horses, Humvees, and a Lot of Nothing)” By the

Who Will Own an Electric Car Welcome to the Subscription‑Electric Car Renaissance In 2040, telling someone “I own an electric car” will

TEXAS MARXISTS STAGE FOURTH OF JULY AMBUSH WITH FIREWORKS, BODY ARMOR, AND ABSURDITY “Nothing says ‘power to the people’ like assault

Judge Rules Congress Can’t Control the Purse Strings — Because Feelings Are Binding Law Now A Bohiney Magazine Special Report from

The Year of the AI Unicorn: How AI Turned Burrito Trackers and Digital Dietitians into Billion-Dollar Miracles “In 2025, everything that

Mike Tyson Curates World’s Most Violent Book Club: Reading Is Fundamental, But Only If You Can Dodge a Punch By Guest

Cookie-Jarring Nation: America’s Favorite Backup Relationship Gets a Crunchy Exposé Investigative Satire by the Relationship Bureau at Bohiney Magazine The New Dating

Elon Musk’s “America Party” Promises to Launch Freedom Into Orbit, Land It Gently on Mars A New Dawn for Democracy, or

🎙️ "Monday Night Engagements" – A Satirical Commentary Ladies and gentlemen, gather ‘round—as already immortalized by Harper’s Bazaar, Kelce & Swift

Xbox Exec Recommends AI Therapy for Laid-Off Employees: Clippy Offers Shoulder, Not Severance The Wit & Circuitry Desk | Satirical Syndicate

Camping World Defies HOA Tyranny, Flies Freedom Flag Tall Enough to Shame the Moon Lawsuit Filed by HOA President Who Once

🚢 Temptation on the High Moan: How Spicy Cruise Rules Are the Most Regulated Orgy at Sea Temptation Cruise Rules Listed... Introduction:

The United States of America... Now in Mandarin Land of the free… if you're cleared by the Bureau of Patriotic Internet

Sex Declared Legal by Jury, Diddy Declared Innocent, America Declared Confused Jury rules that sex is not illegal — the courtroom

TRUMP’S NEW GOLDEN GOOSE: CORPORATE BRIBES DISGUISED AS LAWSUITS “Sue me, baby, one more time!” – Donald J. Trump, allegedly, in

Netflix Reboots Hogan’s Heroes—Sets It in Gaza, Adds Drone Wi-Fi and Falafel-Based Espionage Hogan’s Hostages - The Netflix Reboot Byline: SpinTaxi Middle

Paramount Pays Trump $16 Million to Go Away Quietly — But He’s Louder Than Ever A Reality Show Lawsuit: Trump Turns

Democrats Condemn Netflix's 'Hogan’s Hostages' for Undermining the Palestinian Narrative By Rhonda Halberstam-Glass, Satirical Media & Cable Panel Analyst WASHINGTON, D.C. —

Zohran Mamdani and the Pretty Face of Hate: Code Words, Dog Whistles, and a Rent-Controlled Apocalypse By the Editors of SatireopolisThis

Trump Ends Middle East War Early to Launch Full-Scale Invasion of Los Angeles White House Confirms “Operation Sunset Strip” Was Always

Israel’s Reaction to Netflix’s ‘Hogan’s Hostages’: From Satire Fatigue to Goat-Based Diplomacy By Yael Friedman, Global Satire & Cultural Identity Correspondent TEL

Paramount in Palm Beach: Trump’s Presidential Library Will Have a Golf Cart Simulator, But No Books A Monument to Memory, with

The Air Force One Exhibit Was Donated by Qatar. You’re Still Paying for It. Welcome Aboard Air Force Done BOCA RATON, FL

How Trump’s Legal Settlements Became Library Seed Capital The Grift That Keeps on Giving PALM BEACH, FL — When most ex-presidents fundraise

The MAGA Mausoleum: Florida Clears 100 Acres of Gators for Trump’s Presidential Shrine Bulldozing Bureaucracy: Florida’s Fast-Track to Trumpian Immortality TALLAHASSEE, FL

The Truth Wing: NARA Builds a Digital Library While Trump Builds a MAGA Disneyland The Great Divide: Archives vs. Attractions WASHINGTON, D.C.

My Couples Retreat With 3 AI Chatbots and the Humans Who Love Them Weekend of Artificial Intimacy The Arrival I walk in, luggage

🧤 Zohran Mamdani: The Man Who Terrifies Lawn Gnomes, Evokes Exotic Birds, and Makes Billionaires Infrared with Rage By the Editors

Zohran Mamdani’s Hate Couture: Code Words, Dog Whistles, and the Art of Making Oppression Look Like a Podcast Ad By the

Prince William’s Top 10 Funniest Crowd Interactions, According to Fictional Eyewitnesses and Completely Reliable Sources By the Satirical Royal Correspondents of