I’m not inconsistent, I’m just a shapeshifter of intention. (Believes in commitment until they don’t.)
Promises Written in Dry Erase Marker
From Soulmate to “New Vibe Who Dis?”
“I’m not inconsistent, I’m just a shapeshifter of intention,” they explain, while unfollowing you mid-date and updating their bio to “emotionally nomadic.”
Funny Evidence from the Fleeting Feelings Federation
One person ended a situationship by mailing a candle labeled “It Was Real (ish).” Another retracted a love confession during intermission at *Wicked.*
Quote from a Temporal Lover
“My yes is always true–in the moment,” said Flowvia Drift. “And when the wind shifts, so does my allegiance to Tuesday plans.”
Satirical Snapshot
They treat promises like breathwork: inhale certainty, exhale updates. Their vision board is made of sticky notes and vibes.
Conclusion: Flexibility Is Lovely–Until People Slip on It
You don’t need a five-year plan, but maybe stop bailing mid-hug.
For more whimsical whiplash, shift softly at bohiney.com
