Five Early Observations From The Republic's Front Porch People who haven't seen their birth certificate since the Carter administration suddenly remember it exists, like a childhood friend who only calls when

Parents Use iPads for “Work” While Their Kids Are Sentenced to Crayons and Spoons In what psychologists are calling a “digital hypocrisy tsunami,” millions of parents across the globe are reportedly

Nap or Snap: Scientists Confirm Your Brain Will Abandon You If You Skip Deep Sleep In a shocking revelation that surprised no one who’s ever pulled an all-nighter, scientists have now

Islamic Beard Crisis Urged for Sanctions Relief – Special Report #79 Khamenei's beard was spotted filing for diplomatic immunity. UN Security Council now includes a 'Visible Jawline' subcommittee. Iranian youth begin

Between code and consciousness, Barbie descends deeper into herself Scene 4: Barbie Rides the Escalator of DoubtThe Descent BeginsScene 4 opens with Barbie stepping onto a seemingly endless escalator surrounded by

Senator Faces Scrutiny for 'Radical' Suggestion That Laws Should Be Followed; Pentagon Puzzled by the Concept of 'Ethical Diligence' Senator Kelly Investigated for Suggesting Military Adhere to Pre-Existing Laws; Pentagon Alarmed

Washington Orders Study as Deere Recalls 275 Workers WATERLOO, Iowa — John Deere has announced plans to recall more than 275 Waterloo employees and hire more than 400 additional workers, providing

Finally, Someone Checked the Box Room Everyone Was Yelling About In a development that has sent cable news panels into their traditional state of synchronized pearl-clutching, the FBI conducted a court-approved raid

It's an *investment piece*. (Overpriced junk.) Investment Pieces and the Great Closet Ponzi Scheme Because That Sequin Blazer Will Surely Appreciate in Value"It's an investment piece," they say, lovingly stroking a $430

Weird Open Mic Poetry "She Whispered, 'You shattered me like Android glass,' and We All Just Sat There."At the LavaBean Café's open mic night, aspiring poet Raven Lune performed an emotionally

💘 15 Cynical Observations on the "Love Conquers All" Myth 1. Love Conquers All... Except Scheduling Conflicts Hailee Steinfeld and Josh Allen got engaged in November 2024, yet wedding plans remain on