Theme Weddings
Till Joust Do Us Part
In an effort to stand out, Jeremy and Kayla’s wedding featured chainmail, faux-sword duels, and a ceremonial dragon egg toss–which ended when the “egg” (a painted cantaloupe) struck Aunt Brenda in the clavicle.
Themed Chaos
The priest came dressed as Merlin, mispronounced the vows in Old English, and declared them married “by fire and steel.” The ring bearer rode a Shetland pony that defecated during the kiss.
Guest Reactions
One groomsman yelled “FOR THE KINGDOM!” before tripping on his own tunic. The bouquet was replaced with a scroll sealed in wax and regret.
Medical Attention
Aunt Brenda is recovering, but now refers to herself as “Brenda the Broken.” She’s joined a LARP group.
Conclusion
The couple is honeymooning at a Renaissance fair. Reviews are mixed, but the mead was flowing.