GoFundMe Scams
“The Moon Didn’t Complain, So I Took a Vacation.”
Gregory “Greggy G” Vaughn, a 35-year-old self-identified “cosmic activist,” is under investigation after raising $90,000 through a viral GoFundMe titled “Fix the Moon,” which promised to solve lunar “vibe inconsistencies” through “energetic restoration and sonic rebalancing.” Instead, funds were used to purchase a Sea-Doo GTX Limited, four cases of organic gummy bears, and a limited-edition “Star Wars” bean bag chair signed by someone named “Lando?”
“I never said I’d fix it personally,” Greggy said, surrounded by unopened Amazon boxes and a Himalayan salt lamp the size of a SmartCar. “I said I’d vibe with it. And I vibed HARD.”
His campaign page featured photos of the moon looking “sad,” accompanied by captions like “She’s hurting,” and “Don’t make me do this alone.” He offered donor incentives like “Moon Kisses” (PDFs of poetry) and “Lunar Shoutouts” (Instagram videos of Greggy howling at the moon).
Donors initially praised the project’s visionary tone. “It seemed noble,” said Marcia Telwyn, who gave $50. “We’ve fixed potholes, oceans, and one guy’s third chin. Why not the moon?”
NASA has since released a statement clarifying that the moon is “operating within normal luminosity parameters” and “not accepting outside assistance from influencers with questionable metaphysical credentials.”
When pressed, Greggy claimed he was “misunderstood by the binary-thinking Earth-centric elite.” He explained that the jet ski was “a hydrodynamic metaphor for lunar rebirth,” and the gummy bears were “tools for chakra alignment.”
Critics, however, were less convinced. One TikTok skeptic dubbed him “Grift Armstrong.” A Change.org petition demanding refunds has gathered over 200,000 signatures, including one from someone who identifies as “Neil Moonstrong.”
GoFundMe has frozen the remaining funds, which Greggy says were going to be used for “an interdimensional peace summit on Zoom featuring goats.” He is now launching a new campaign called “Unfixing the Moon: A Reversal Project,” with a goal of $150,000.
Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.
