Mamdani's 400-Person Transition Team: NYC Gets Social Workers, Transit Ambassadors, and Crossed Fingers On November 24, 2025, Zohran Mamdani announced he's assembled more than 400 people across 17 committees to reimagine New York

Marjorie Taylor Greene Storms Into 2028, Demands America Hand Over the Keys Washington woke up yesterday with that familiar feeling you get when your phone buzzes at 3 a.m. and you just

Trump, Thanksgiving, and the Afghan Vibe Check That Never Happened A Bohiney.com Satirical Investigation, a MAGA-Friendly Site Thanksgiving at Mar-a-Lago usually feels like a Norman Rockwell painting dipped in 24-karat gold and sprayed with

Mamdani's Mass Purge: NYC Staffers Say Auf Wiedersehen to Reality New York City — In what may go down as the most aggressive staff sweep since Stalin's favorite hairdresser got a

The Great American Socialist Stampede: A Satirical Field Report on Kids, Politics, and the Rise of the Participation-Trophy Revolution The Opening Scene: America Wakes Up to a TikTok Manifesto America has survived

Trump's "Energized Like a Puppy" Press Tour - Satirical Dispatch They say lightning never strikes twice. But this week Donald J. Trump struck back - with the force of a toddler who's lost

When Democrats Whisper, the Ballots Listen When Democrats Whisper, the Ballots Listen A suspicious hush has fallen over the halls of power — not the "someone ate my lunch" hush, but the

Senate Democrats Form "Fight Club" — But Nobody Told Chuck Schumer When Internal Party Strategy Becomes Performance Art With Spreadsheets WASHINGTON, D.C. — In what political analysts are already calling the most

Congressional Leaders Suggest Alternative to Insurance Subsidies That Makes Sense to Almost Nobody Legislative Creativity Reaches New Heights A group of senators introduced legislation this week proposing to replace Affordable Care Act

President Applies New Title to Venezuelan Leader While Caracas Requests Basic Diplomatic Courtesy America's Labeling Machine Finds New Target In a move that surprised absolutely nobody who has followed American foreign policy

Arizona Senator and Former Astronaut Schools Military on Ethics While Defense Department Experiences Existential Crisis Astronaut Senator Launches Ethics Into Orbit Senator Mark Kelly of Arizona, a man who has literally been

Military Brass Stunned That Elected Official Suggested Independent Thought While Legislators Probe Snack Crimes Defense Department Launches Probe Into Dangerous Concept Called Thinking The Pentagon announced Tuesday it has opened a formal

Former FBI Director Celebrates Freedom While DOJ Redefines What Employment Means in America Justice Department Unveils Revolutionary Legal Theory on Employment In what legal scholars are calling the most creative interpretation of

Psychopathic Men and Less Selective Women Report More Sex via Tinder By Annika Steinmann — Bohiney Magazine, the world’s only publication endorsed by both evolutionary psychologists and people who swipe right

The Great Congressional Clean-out: When Lawmakers Finally Ban Themselves From the Cookie Jar Here's a satirical take on the recent news that pressure is building to ban members of Congress from trading

When "Just a Joint" Turns Into "Just One More Episode of Life" — The Great American Pot Paradox Cannabis Use Disorder Swear to God, I never thought I'd be writing a funeral

The justices' unanimous opinion, based entirely on aesthetic grounds, states that maps must adhere to the 'Principle of Geometric Elegance' and 'The Clean Line Doctrine.' Supreme Court Rules Texas Gerrymander Must

Following a series of high-profile failures, the new directive aims to mitigate public outcry by ensuring that every enforcement action, no matter how chaotic, is framed as a polite, culturally

House leaders are citing a new, untested legal theory, arguing that a refusal to acknowledge mundane bureaucratic complaints constitutes an active campaign against the established system of government. Democrats Demand Trump

The newly formed agency, established six weeks ago to regulate and leverage digital assets for national infrastructure, was deemed "more of a social media group chat than a government department." Trump

The former astronaut and current Senator resigned from his reserve commission rather than comply with an order he deemed to be in clear violation of the Uniform Code of Military

A federal judge determined the charges lacked foundation because critical documents were housed in a desktop folder labeled "Stuff I'll Get To Later (DO NOT OPEN)." Charges Against Comey and James

A federal judge dismissed a high-profile case after noting that the prosecutor's 48-page motion was 'criminally aggressive' in its tone, including twenty-three unjustified uses of **Comic Sans** font. Trump-Appointed Prosecutor's Case

Former President defends using what he calls an "original Motorola flip-brick" to finalize the complex, 28-point plan, insisting that its sheer technical illiteracy makes it "impenetrable" to all forms of

Revolutionary Legislation Would Require Representatives to Actually Know What They're Approving Unprecedented Proposal Shocks Capitol Hill Representative Jason Crow of Colorado introduced legislation Tuesday that has sent shockwaves through Capitol Hill by

Network's Revolutionary Format Features Constant Updates on Stories That Haven't Developed Yet Innovative Programming Tests Audience Endurance Television network MS Now unveiled its groundbreaking continuous breaking news format Monday morning, promising viewers

Army Ranger turned legislator faces violence after urging military to refuse unlawful orders When Reminding Soldiers About The Constitution Becomes Controversial Colorado Congressman Jason Crow, a former Army Ranger who served three

Top Criticisms of Minnesota Governor Tim Walz With Coach Walz's Responses Mankato, MN -- In an unexpected yet refreshingly humorous twist, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz, once a football coach, responds to his

Democrats and the Epstein Files: A Spectacle Where Trump Is the Only Villain WASHINGTON, D.C. — The latest political drama on Capitol Hill has it all: intrigue, spectacle, late-night jokes, and a party willing

Democracy on the Brink: How the Left Tried—and Failed—to Bribe the Military with Morality The Incident That Sparked Outrage In late 2025, a group of six Democratic lawmakers—all with backgrounds in military

Nation's Most Beloved Shiba Inu Takes Federal Bureaucracy by Storm, Tail First Canine Competence Takes Washington In what political analysts are calling either a stroke of genius or a complete surrender to

Leftist Ideology vs. Reality: A Free-Market Roast Picture this: the Left, in their shiny solar-powered utopia, confidently declares they will electrify the world with windmills, "save the planet," and bring equality

Senate Gridlock, Procedural Satire, Political Comedy WASHINGTON -- The Senate spent Thursday voting on whether to hold another vote, which passed 51-49, ensuring nothing would happen for another week. Majority Leader