Hoverboard Fails
“They Thought It Was Performance. It Was Actually a Mild Concussion.”
Jeremy Boone decided to make his morning commute more “futuristically chill” by hoverboarding the eight blocks to his co-working space. What he didn’t expect was a collision with Marcel, a local mime mid-routine, that sent both men tumbling into an unplanned–and deeply symbolic–tableau of modern chaos.
“I was gliding like a tech god,” Jeremy said. “Then bam–face full of invisible box and beret.”
Passersby applauded wildly, believing it to be an edgy performance piece titled *Late Capitalism Collides with Silent Resistance.* A local art student sketched the scene. A TikTok influencer labeled it “Neo-Dada with wheels.”
Neither Jeremy nor Marcel could convince the crowd they weren’t part of an installation. A nearby gallery offered them a residency.
Jeremy now uses a traditional scooter. Marcel still performs–but avoids eye contact with anything on wheels.
The hoverboard, still dented, was sold as “interactive sculpture.”
Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.
