Tacky Honeymoon Destinations
“We Wanted Romance. We Got Yeast Rolls and Ye Cursed Plumbing.”
Newlyweds Brett and Darlene booked their honeymoon at “The Joust Inn,” a medieval-themed gas station motel in rural Arkansas offering “Excalibur Energy” rooms, dragon-themed soap, and complimentary turkey legs served in goblets.
“The website promised ‘a royal escape.’ It did not mention the shower being a trough,” Darlene said.
Their room featured a flickering torch lamp, a knight-shaped mini fridge that only chilled “mead and regrets,” and a mattress as firm as peasant rebellion.
The complimentary “wake-up crow” turned out to be a recording of a rooster having an identity crisis. The jacuzzi was filled with suspiciously warm root beer.
Despite the oddities, Brett said, “It was unforgettable. Like tetanus with a tiara.”
The couple left a three-star review titled *Moat Problems but Great Grits*, and launched a travel blog focused solely on poorly themed lodgings.
The Joust Inn now advertises itself as “America’s Only Renaissance Rest Stop.”
Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.
