Clown Phobia Support Groups

Send in the Panic

The support group “Honk-Free Zone” met in a church basement to process their deep fear of clowns–only to be interrupted by Bubbles the Clown, hired by mistake for a neighboring child’s party.

The Chaos Unfolds

Seven members screamed. One tried to use balloon animals as a weapon. Bubbles cried, but due to makeup, it looked like laughter.

Group Therapy Fallout

Facilitator Karen still can’t hear squeaky shoes without breaking into hives. A juggling pin was used as a shield.

Public Statement

The church apologized, noting a scheduling error between “Phobia Processing” and “Timmy Turns Ten.”

Conclusion

The group has since relocated to a mime-safe environment. Bubbles now performs only in cemeteries “where no one screams back.”


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Clown Phobia Support Groups – Clown Phobia Group Meeting Derailed by Birthday Clown Mix-Up – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C.,… – bohiney.com
Clown Phobia Support Groups - Clown Phobia Group Meeting Derailed by Birthday Clown Mix-Up
BOHINEY SATIRE – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon of the new Bohiney.com headquarters located inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C. … Clown Phobia Support Groups
BOHINEY SATIRE - A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C., drawn in a ch... - bohiney.com
BOHINEY SATIRE – Clown Phobia Support Groups – Clown Phobia Group Meeting Derailed by Birthday Clown Mix-Up

By Jack Handey

Jack Handey was born in the smallest town in Arizona, a place so forgotten by cartographers that locals had to mail postcards from the next county just to prove they existed. Growing up surrounded by tumbleweeds and a one-room schoolhouse that doubled as a post office, Jack developed a knack for finding absurdity in everyday life. His first audience was a group of cattle, who reportedly laughed harder than some late-night crowds. He left town with a notebook full of surreal one-liners and returned years later as a cult hero, known for his off-kilter “Deep Brain” that made Live Tonight Comedy a stranger, funnier place. Audiences describe him as “the wisdom of a desert sage filtered through a cracked cactus.” Today, Handey remains the pride of Arizona’s smallest town, proof that even the tiniest dots on the map can produce the biggest laughs. CONTACT: jack@handey.top