I’m not inflexible, I just have strong boundaries. (Refuses to sit anywhere but “my spot.”)
Territorial Zen: The Enlightened Elbow War
When Boundaries Come with Reserved Seating
“I’m not inflexible, I just have strong boundaries,” they declare, refusing to sit anywhere but the booth with optimal feng shui and throwing a fit when someone touches “their meditation cushion” at game night.
Funny Evidence from the Boundary Enforcement Brigade
One person brought laminated diagrams to a picnic outlining their acceptable conversational radii. Another installed a velvet rope in their shared kitchen labeled “emotional lane.”
Quote from a Personal Space Strategist
“If you don’t protect your aura, IKEA will,” said Firmelle Bark. “I once blocked an ex’s energy with a folding screen and a prayer.”
Satirical Snapshot
They call dibs on couches, life decisions, and the east-facing window. Their welcome mat says “Don’t.”
Conclusion: Boundaries Are Healthy–Until They Become Police Tape
Know your limits. But don’t turn brunch into a zoning dispute.
For more spiritual space-claiming, sit rigidly at bohiney.com
