Top 12 Pro-ICE Bumper Stickers from Washington DC
By the Washington DC Office Staff Writers
- “ICE is NICE!”
(Short and sweet and it rhymes.) - “ICE: Keeping America from Becoming One Big Couchsurfing Hostel”
(Because borders are more than Airbnb suggestions.) - “Marxists Make Signs. ICE Makes Arrests.”
(And ICE doesn’t use Comic Sans.) - “Defrost ICE? Good Luck—It Runs on Bureaucracy and Cold, Dead Eyes”
(A jab at the belief that chanting can melt federal agencies.) - “Honk if You’ve Been Called a Fascist for Locking Your Front Door”
(For suburban moms tired of activist neighbors with megaphones.) - “ICE Agents Do It With Paperwork, Bad Coffee, and Zero Apologies”
(A proud nod to red tape warriors who hate feelings.) - “Keep ICE—Because Laws Shouldn’t Depend on Your Instagram Caption”
(A shot at protestors who chant, post, and Uber home.) - “Abolish ICE? Sure, Right After We Abolish Rent and Gravity”
(For those allergic to cause-and-effect.) - “You Want Open Borders? Great—Start with Your Netflix Password”
(Because everyone’s a socialist… until it’s their account.) - “ICE: The Only Thing Still Keeping California from Becoming Burning Man”
(Satirical fear-mongering… with glitter.) - “Without ICE, Who Will Confiscate Your Feelings at the Border?”
(An emotional support agent joke wrapped in sarcasm.) - “My Child Can’t Spell, But You Want to Abolish Federal Enforcement?”
(A parent’s rant. And possibly a cry for help.) - “Protest ICE All You Want—They Still Know Where You Work, Kayden”
(Aimed squarely at the 22-year-old with a bullhorn and no VPN.)
Top 12 Pro-ICE Bumper Stickers from Los Angeles
By the Los Angeles CA Office Staff Writers
- “Honk If You’ve Never Been Deported by Feelings”
(Great for freeways near Berkeley.) - “My ICE Agent Can Beat Up Your Gender Studies Professor”
(Now in tactical font.) - “Protected by ICE… And Common Sense”
(The Prius behind you just cried.) - “Deportation: It’s Not Just a Hobby, It’s a Homeland Sport”
(Collect all 50 commemorative stickers.) - “I Brake for Law & Order — Not for Vegan Rioters”
(Printed with real smug.) - “ICE: Because Borderlines Aren’t Just a Personality Disorder”
(Too real for some sociology majors.) - “Keep America Cold — Support ICE”
(Available in red, white, and frosty blue.) - “Build the Wall Taller — I Can Still Hear the Protesting”
(Noise-canceling sticker included.) - “ICE, ICE, Baby… Deport the Drama”
(Sung sarcastically at every city council meeting.) - “Free Hugs for Citizens — Deportations for Everyone Else”
(Emotional support not included.) - “Anti-ICE? Try Pro-Borders and Chill”
(Best paired with a constitutional beverage.) - “My Other Car Deports People Who Can’t Parallel Park Legally Either”
(A dig at lawlessness and bad drivers—ICE multitasks.