People Who Think Their Dog Is an “Empath”
My Dog’s an Empath: Diagnosing Canine Clairvoyance with Zero Evidence
Because Barking at the Mailman Means He Senses Vibes
Some people believe their dog isn’t just a pet–it’s an empath, healer, therapist, and intuitive spiritual vessel. Especially when it interrupts yoga by vomiting string on the carpet.
Funny Evidence from the Pet Psychic Underground
“My dog could feel my grief,” said one woman. “He stared into my soul for five minutes… then ate my socks and threw up.” Another insists her beagle only howls when Mercury is in retrograde.
Quote from a Canine Medium
“Baxter absorbs my energy,” said @PawWhisperer88. “He knows when I’m sad. And also when there’s cheese.”
Satirical Behavior Analysis
People confuse “empathic” behavior with “food-motivated” and “bored.” Their dogs may not be spiritual guides, but they are really good at licking faces mid-panic attack.
Conclusion: Your Dog Might Love You, But He’s Not a Therapist
It’s okay to love your pet. Just don’t book it for your next Reiki session. Especially if it humps guests and eats drywall.
For more emotionally available animals, sniff your way to bohiney.com
