I don’t speed. (Goes 20 over.)

Speed Limit Suggestionists: The Law Is Just a Vibe

Driving by Feel, Not by Number

“I don’t speed,” they claim, merging at warp velocity while their bumper screams “Close Enough” in bold font. That 45 MPH sign? Merely decorative.

Funny Evidence from the Fast and the Fictitious

One woman got pulled over going 72 in a 35 and said, “I was flowing with traffic.” There was no traffic. Another guy said, “Speeding is relative,” then failed physics and a field sobriety test.

Quote from a Velocity Denier

“It’s not speeding if you’re late,” said Kyle MPH, adjusting his sunglasses and ignoring his third warning from the same cop this month.

Satirical Snapshot

These folks think cruise control is a challenge. They mistake acceleration for ambition and braking for weakness.

Conclusion: If Your Drive Feels Like a Chase Scene, You Might Be the Problem

Go ahead and live fast–just remember, the DMV keeps records, and so does karma.

For more reckless rationalizations, floor it to bohiney.com