Haunted Baby Monitors
“We Thought It Was a Ghost. It Was Just Our Marital Tension Echoing Through the Nursery.”
New parents Tara and Leo Cummings were horrified when their baby monitor began picking up soft, unintelligible whispers around 3 a.m. Initially convinced their house was haunted, they called a paranormal investigator and began saging the crib. But after two nights of spectral surveillance, they recognized the voices: it was themselves–arguing about who left the dishwasher open and why the diaper bin “smells like despair.”
“Turns out the monitor has a loop-recording feature,” Leo explained. “We were basically haunting ourselves with sleep-deprived pettiness.”
They captured audio clips like: “You didn’t even burp him!” followed by “That’s rich coming from the man who put wipes in the fridge.”
Instead of fleeing, the couple leaned in. Tara edited the audio into a lo-fi beat mix and posted it to Spotify under the artist name *Parental Advisory Ghosts.*
It now has over 20,000 streams and is being used in yoga classes for “realistic background tension.”
The baby? Slept through everything.
The couple is now marketing the haunted monitor as *EchoNest, the first baby monitor with passive-aggressive playback features.*
Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.
