I’ll just sleep on the plane. (Doesn’t sleep at all.)

Sky Sleepless: The Lie You Tell Yourself at 30,000 Feet

Dreaming of Sleep While Screaming Babies and Seatbelt Dings Sing

“I’ll just sleep on the plane,” they declare–confident, cozy in theory. Twelve hours later? Eyes wide, neck twisted, and soul shattered somewhere over the Atlantic.

Funny Evidence from the Mile-High Insomnia Club

One woman brought a memory foam neck pillow, essential oils, and white noise app–and still ended up watching *Hotel Transylvania 3* four times in despair. Another tried melatonin and woke up to a toddler eating pretzels on his chest.

Quote from a Sleep-Deprived Flier

“My body was ready,” said Darren Dreamless. “The baby two rows back was not.”

Satirical Snapshot

They planned for REM cycles, but got armrest wars, turbulence, and a seatmate who decided now was a great time to open tuna salad.

Conclusion: The Only Thing You’ll Catch Is a Crick in Your Neck

Bring snacks, bring headphones–but maybe leave your hope for real sleep back at the gate with your dignity.

For more airborne agony, fly unconscious to bohiney.com