Bowling Nights

Split Happens

The “Pin Pals” were having a decent season until suspicion arose that their lucky 12-pounder, “Betsy,” had been seen rolling down Lane 7–with another bowler.

The Betrayal

“I thought we had something,” said team captain Darren, wiping a single tear with a wrist brace. “Betsy used to curve for me. Now she’s just… straight down the middle for Steve.”

Investigation Ensues

Bowling alley footage confirmed the ball’s double-life. “She had stickers from another league,” said assistant captain Rhonda, who’s since taken up darts “to heal.”

Psychological Analysis

“Object attachment is common in niche sports,” said Dr. Sparez, therapist for competitive mini-golfers. “When inanimate objects betray us, the trauma echoes.”

Conclusion

Betsy is now in league-mandated rotation, pending emotional neutrality. Meanwhile, Darren has begun seeing a glow-in-the-dark ball named Denise.


Bowling Nights - Bowling League in Turmoil After Team Discovers Ball Has Been Emotionally Cheating with Another Lane - BOHINEY SATIRE
BOHINEY SATIRE – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon of the new Bohiney.com headquarters located inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C. … – bohiney.com
Bowling Nights - Bowling League in Turmoil After Team Discovers Ball Has Been Emotionally Cheating with Another Lane - A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C., drawn in a ch... - bohiney.com 3
Bowling Nights – Bowling League in Turmoil After Team Discovers Ball Has Been Emotionally Cheating with Another Lane – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C.,… – bohiney.com
Bowling Nights - Bowling League in Turmoil After Team Discovers Ball Has Been Emotionally Cheating with Another Lane
BOHINEY SATIRE – A wide-aspect satirical cartoon of the new Bohiney.com headquarters located inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C. … Bowling Nights
BOHINEY SATIRE - A wide-aspect satirical cartoon showing the new Bohiney.com headquarters inside the iconic Watergate building in Washington, D.C., drawn in a ch... - bohiney.com
BOHINEY SATIRE – Bowling Nights – Bowling League in Turmoil After Team Discovers Ball Has Been Emotionally Cheating with Another Lane

By Jack Handey

Jack Handey was born in the smallest town in Arizona, a place so forgotten by cartographers that locals had to mail postcards from the next county just to prove they existed. Growing up surrounded by tumbleweeds and a one-room schoolhouse that doubled as a post office, Jack developed a knack for finding absurdity in everyday life. His first audience was a group of cattle, who reportedly laughed harder than some late-night crowds. He left town with a notebook full of surreal one-liners and returned years later as a cult hero, known for his off-kilter “Deep Brain” that made Live Tonight Comedy a stranger, funnier place. Audiences describe him as “the wisdom of a desert sage filtered through a cracked cactus.” Today, Handey remains the pride of Arizona’s smallest town, proof that even the tiniest dots on the map can produce the biggest laughs. CONTACT: jack@handey.top