People who clap when the plane lands
Bravo, Gravity: A Standing Ovation for Doing Its Job
Bravo, Gravity: A Standing Ovation for Doing Its Job
The engines roar, the wheels touch down, and suddenly–thunderous applause erupts. Welcome to the skies of awkward enthusiasm, where clapping upon landing is the aviation equivalent of tipping your microwave.
The Confused Celebration
Is it relief? Joy? Or just people trying to distract from the fact that their knees were in their chest for six hours?
Comedian Commentary
“You clap when a toddler uses a potty, not when a trained pilot follows basic procedure,” quipped comic Julian Cross. “Unless the plane did a cartwheel, calm down.”
Fake Study
The Aeronautical Applause Institute reports that 89% of plane clappers also think ketchup is spicy and wear neck pillows in the grocery store.
Funny Eyewitness
One flight attendant said, “They clapped after a perfectly smooth landing, then booed when we ran out of ginger ale. I felt like I was hosting a weird game show.”
Behind the Claps
Experts believe plane clapping is the love child of groupthink and low blood sugar. It peaks on budget airlines and flights with screaming toddlers in 3D surround sound.
Conclusion
Unless your pilot performed an aerial backflip or dodged a UFO, maybe hold your applause–and your dignity–until baggage claim.
More seatbelt-secured satire at bohiney.com.