Responsibilities Include Dodging Blame and Blaming Dodges

Trump Appoints “Secretary of Not My Fault” to Cabinet, Chooses Former WWE Referee for Role

Responsibilities Include Dodging Blame and Blaming Dodges

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move that further blurs the line between politics and professional wrestling, President Donald Trump has created a new cabinet position: Secretary of Not My Fault. The role has been given to legendary former WWE referee Earl Hebner, best known for missing every illegal chair shot in the early 2000s.

“Nobody knows how to avoid responsibility like Earl,” Trump said at the Rose Garden announcement. “He’s been ignoring obvious infractions since the Reagan era.”

The Secretary of Not My Fault will oversee national scapegoating logistics, reverse-engineering of public outrage, and the Federal Office of Shrugging.

Hebner arrived in a sleeveless suit, waved to reporters, and immediately denied ever being at the press conference.

When asked who would be blamed for any mistakes made in this new role, Trump responded, “That’s exactly the kind of thing Earl is here to prevent — from being my fault.”

Early memos from the office include directives like “Always respond to subpoenas with pro wrestling catchphrases” and “Use smoke machines during press briefings to exit dramatically.”

Democrats attempted to protest, but were disqualified for using logic in a no-facts match.

=========
SOURCES:

How to Be POTUS Without Reading Anything

and

How to Be POTUS Without Ever Apologizing