TMI on First Dates
“He Said Transparency Is Key. I Didn’t Know That Included a Slide on His Weeping Phase.”
When marketing analyst Darren Plutz showed up to his first date with a projector and HDMI cable, his companion Marissa assumed he was pitching a startup. Instead, she witnessed a 37-slide PowerPoint titled *Darren: A Journey Through Love, Therapy, and That One Time with a Tarot Reader.*
“Slide 12 was literally titled ‘Mother Issues: The Awakening,'” Marissa reported. “I hadn’t even ordered my drink.”
The presentation included graphs of past relationship failures, a mood chart color-coded by breakup song, and a bullet point list of emotional triggers (“Crunchy peanut butter, loud doorbells, Virgos”).
“I just believe in front-loading the hard stuff,” Darren said. “Why wait until date three to reveal my attachment style and recurring dream about abandoned Trader Joe’s carts?”
Halfway through, Darren offered Marissa her own laser pointer to “highlight concerns in real-time.” She used it to flag the exit.
Despite the abrupt end, Darren’s story went viral after Marissa live-tweeted the ordeal. Now, he’s a minor internet folk hero known as “Slide Deck Romeo.”
He’s currently offering an e-course: *PowerPointing Your Past: Branding Trauma for Romance.*
Auf Wiedersehen, amigos.
