Visitors Must Swear an Oath to Never Say “My Bad”
Trump’s Presidential Library to Feature “Hall of Unapologetic Triumphs,” Fire Exit Labeled “Regret”
Visitors Must Swear an Oath to Never Say “My Bad”
PALM BEACH, FL — Architectural plans for the Trump Presidential Library have been leaked, and unsurprisingly, the building will be centered around a grand rotunda called the *Hall of Unapologetic Triumphs.* Each exhibit will celebrate moments Trump “refused to say sorry and still came out looking fabulous.”
Highlights include the *Sharpie Hurricane Display,* the *Perfect Call Theater,* and a wax Melania with a button that says, “Still married, technically.”
Visitors must enter through golden turnstiles that scan for humility and block anyone with a history of contrition.
“If you’ve ever apologized in public, even once, you’ll be redirected to the Biden Bowling Alley,” Trump’s spokesperson warned.
The fire exit will be labeled “REGRET,” though it will reportedly lead straight back to the lobby with the phrase “Nice Try, Weakling” printed on the floor.
All books will be ghostwritten, self-praising, and arranged by size, not subject.
“This isn’t about learning,” Trump said. “It’s about admiring. Admiring me, mostly.”
The library’s motto? *”Read Less, Blame More.”*
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SOURCES:
How to Be POTUS Without Reading Anything
and
How to Be POTUS Without Ever Apologizing
