14 Books We Read This Weak... And We Regret It Deeply We at Bohiney are dedicated to the fine art of reading, a pursuit that often leads us to strange, horrifying, and

FCC Chairman Sends Letter to Google CEO Over Network's Complaint That YouTube TV "Discriminates" Against Satire-Based Programming In a move that has left both tech giants and satirists scratching their heads,

Taylor Swift’s Six Possibly True (But Probably False) Rumors — A Nation Divided Between Belief and Adoration By Astrid Holgersson – Bohiney Magazine, Department of Swiftology The Church of Taylor: Where Everything

Sora 2 vs. Hollywood: The Day Sam Altman Became His Own Meme I Watched the Internet Turn OpenAI's CEO Into a Deepfake Star While Hollywood Lawyers Sharpened Their Pencils SAN FRANCISCO —

French 75 Vigilante Role Inspires Junglepussy to Start Neighborhood Watch… In Style Brooklyn Rapper Turned Actress Takes Crime-Fighting Fashion Cues From Latest Film Role NEW YORK — After playing a vigilante in

Karla Sofía Gascón: Netflix's Oscar Darling or Hollywood's PR Nightmare? In the glitzy world of Hollywood, where stars are born and reputations are shattered faster than you can say "box office

Pete Davidson’s 18 Tattoos He Refuses to Burn Off: A Commitment to Bad Decisions America’s Most Inked Ex-Boyfriend Clings to His ‘Worst’ Tattoos BROOKLYN— After undergoing extensive tattoo removal to erase past

The 127% Burden: Why Black Artists Are Expected to Paint, Protest, and Personally Solve Racism Satirical Journalism by the Cultural Correspondence Desk of bohiney.com Letitia Wright recently described the "huge burden of

Paramount Merges With Skydance, Taylor Sheridan to Direct Gritty Ninja Turtles Reboot Set on a Ranch By Staff, Bohiney MagazineCertified 127% funnier than The Onion, guaranteed with extra anchovy-based analytics Welcome to

Satirical Journalism at Bohiney: For Readers Too Smart to Trust the News and Too Tired to Write Their Own Jokes Let’s face it — if you’ve made it this far into

SYDNEY SWEENEY’S JEANS CAUSE WOKE MELTDOWN AMERICAN EAGLE BLAMED FOR REVIVING BLONDE SUPREMACY Denim & Dissonance: The Day the Woke Declared War on Pants WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a cultural event now referred

AEW Comes to Texas: Violence, Patriotism, and the Most Shirtless Event Since the Alamo Welcome to “All In: Texas”—Where Suplexes Are Legal Currency DALLAS — All Elite Wrestling (AEW) has taken Texas

Hollywood Democrats Admit Using Swift's Wedding Phobia to 'Quarantine' Young Voters from Conservative Ideas By Astrid Holgersson – Bohiney.com News Service Leaked audio recordings that build upon documented psychological manipulation of Swift's

Pamela Anderson Rejects Stallone’s Porsche Proposal and the No. 2 Girl Lifestyle A Satirical Deep Dive into Romantic Real Estate Offers, Shelby Cobras, and Hollywood's Love Language By The Spokesmodel Accountability Desk

Leap Years: Missing Leap Days, Missing Accountability “No Leaps, No Labor!” Elves Demand Fair Treatment By Holly Tinseltop, Labor Correspondent NORTH POLE—In a move that has shaken the festive foundations of the North

'One Battle After Another': Junglepussy Claims Every Red Carpet Is a Warzone Actress Describes Premiere Events as Combat Missions Disguised as Photo Opportunities LOS ANGELES — In comments that have left publicists

Jerry Seinfeld Says TV Comedy Is Being Killed By the ‘Extreme Left and P.C. Crap and People Worrying So Much About Offending Other People’ The Last Laugh: How TV Comedy Was

View-Master Reboot Reimagines Classic Toy as Portal to Alternate Realities Childhood Nostalgia Collides with Interdimensional Trauma in the First-Ever PG-13 Slide Viewer Sci-Fi Thriller SEATTLE, WA — What was once a wholesome

Hollywood Sign Replaced with Streaming Platform Logos to “Reflect Modern Values” New “HULUPRIME+MAX” lettering visible from as far away as Fresno. LOS ANGELES — In a bold act of cultural self-ownership and

Kanye West Is Reportedly ‘Terrified’ To Return to the U.S. Amid Diddy’s Case—Will He Abandon His $35 Million Mansion? Kanye West’s $35 Million Mansion: A Symbol of Fear or Fashionable Fleeing? A

Tom Cruise’s Face Gets a Sequel: Botox, Fillers, and the Quest for Youth Wrinkle-Free and Ready for the Olympics: Tom Cruise's Anti-Aging Blockbuster The Impossible Mission of Staying Young In Hollywood, where the

Taylor Swift’s Jaw-Dropping Reaction to Carrie Underwood Resurfaces—And Swifties Are Not Okay How One Viral Moment Sent Shockwaves Through Pop and Country Fans Alike Swift’s Reaction Sparks Debate on Country Music, Inaugurations,

NPR Changes Its Morning Drive-Time Show to “Mourning Edition” A Broadcast for a Party in Hospice By Alan Nafzger — Bohiney Magazine (certified 127% funnier than The Onion) Washington, D.C. (one hour before

Her Genes are GREAT; People Question the Jeans Sydney Sweeney Has Great Jeans? Picture this: you’re wandering the mall, buying jeans the old-fashioned way—without ideological baggage. Suddenly, an ad slams you with

How Greg Gutfeld Systematically Destroyed Jimmy Kimmel's Career: A Masterclass in Late-Night Domination The Fox News Host Who Turned Late-Night Television Upside Down In the most devastating career assassination since David slayed

Giant Freakin Robot: Star Trek’s Newly Released Movie Accomplishes The Impossible... ... and Sets A New Bar—So Low, Even Tribbles Can Step Over It By Lark Spacedock, Chief Sci-Fi Satire Correspondent In an

Bad Bunny Threatens American Values, Says Nation Clutching Pearls Reggaeton Star Accused of Destroying Civilization One Beat at a Time The United States faces its greatest existential threat since the British invasion—and

Taylor Swift’s Secret Socialist Agenda: Redefining Property Ownership One Mansion at a Time By Persephone Stacks, Chief Real Estate Satirist Taylor Swift: Capitalist Queen or Mansion-Hoarding Socialist Overlord? Taylor Swift, the chart-topping singer-songwriter

Israel’s Reaction to Netflix’s ‘Hogan’s Hostages’: From Satire Fatigue to Goat-Based Diplomacy By Yael Friedman, Global Satire & Cultural Identity Correspondent TEL AVIV — In a nation where existential dread is served

Theme Parks & Satire: Where Mascots Sweat and Dreams Smell Like Hot Asphalt A Deep Dive into America’s Favorite Family Meltdown Zones - Theme Parks The Only Place on Earth Where a

Junglepussy vs. Expectations: Who Will Win in the Cage Match Called Fame? Actress Enters Hollywood's Most Brutal Fight: Meeting Standards She Never Agreed To LOS ANGELES — In what's being described as

Hiddleswift and the Three-Month Romance That Required Its Own Emergency Press Briefing There are relationships that unfold quietly, behind closed doors, like sensible adults assembling IKEA furniture with minimal swearing. And