Los Angeles Ablaze: The 'Pyrocene' Is Here, and It's Burning Up More Than Just Your Rent Money Scientists warn we’re in the Fire Age, while LA residents wonder if they should

JD Vance and Tim Walz: United by Diet Mountain Dew, Divided by Everything Else Washington, D.C.— In a rare moment of bipartisan unity, Senator JD Vance and Minnesota Governor Tim Walz

Is Chris Kluwe Kluweless? Former NFL "punter" Chris Kluwe was arrested during a Huntington Beach City Council meeting on February 18, 2025, after protesting a plaque at the public library that

Government efficiency project disappears quietly after failing to deliver $1 trillion in savings The Government Efficiency Mirage Vanishes Into Thin Air In a move that shocked absolutely no one paying attention, the

Office of Science and Technology Policy America’s Science Fair in the White House Basement The Office of Science and Technology Policy (OSTP) sits at the intersection of science and government, a magical

Patent Office Discovers It Has Been Approving Patents For The Wheel Since 1995 — 47 Different Inventors Claim Credit Federal Agency Responsible for Innovation Protection Grants Exclusive Rights to 5,000-Year-Old Technology WASHINGTON

Trump's Board of Peace: A Plan So Vague It Could Be Anything (Or Nothing) By Annika Steinmann — Bohiney.com Trump Unveils Gaza Peace Plan: The Grand Diplomatic Theater Diplomacy, like a Vegas buffet,

Democrats Switch to Zionist Hardliners After 'Private Screening' in Unmarked Van Brought to you by the dairy farmer who once infiltrated an AIPAC mixer and the tenured philosopher who has never

The Nation on Bed Rest: Waiting for Recovery with Dr. Trump in the House America’s Four-Year Migraine The Doctor Is In: Capitalism, Populism, and Vitamin T(ump) The nation has been on metaphorical bed

Elon Musk’s Worst Day Ever: A Stock Crash, a Cyberattack, and a Memoir Written in Meme Format The Rise and Fall of a Billionaire’s Tuesday For most people, the worst day ever

The Pettiest Revolution: How the Left Might Retaliate Against Elon Musk Elon Musk was once the poster child of the progressive left—electric cars, space travel, universal basic income, and that endearing

Trump's USPS Makeover: Special Delivery or Return to Sender? By Cletus P. Letterman and Penny Postage The New Postmaster-in-Chief Former President Donald J. Trump is back in the news, and this time, he’s

Democrats Weaponized Taylor Swift Assassination Fears to Control Her Followers Leaked Democratic National Committee strategy documents reveal a sophisticated psychological manipulation campaign that convinced Taylor Swift she faced imminent retaliation from conservative activist

Trump's Europe Immigration Crisis Claims: A Satirical Deep Dive Into Mass Migration Reality By Clara Olsen – Bohiney.com Europe's Immigration Crisis: From Policy to Parody When Donald Trump declared that Europe had been

Elon Musk's Foray into British Politics Musk's Mission to Make Britain "Great" (Again?) The billionaire entrepreneur’s unconventional methods to influence UK politics are as audacious as they are absurd. In a twist that

National Weather Service Discovers What Weather Actually Is After 150 Years — Meteorologists Shocked Federal Forecasting Agency Realizes Atmospheric Conditions Are More Than Random Number Generation SILVER SPRING, MD — The National

The Inaugural Hat: A Satirical Masterstroke In the annals of fashion history, Melania Trump's choice of headwear at her husband's second inauguration might just be remembered as the moment fashion and

Elon Musk's DOGE Enters NOAA: A Forecast of Efficiency or a Storm Brewing? In a move that has left many both amused and alarmed, Elon Musk's Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE)

Trump Ends Middle East War Early to Launch Full-Scale Invasion of Los Angeles White House Confirms “Operation Sunset Strip” Was Always the Real Objective In a stunning reversal of international priorities, former

California Marxists Boo Toddler, Demand Baby Answers for Border Policy ‘Cooing in Fascist Tone,’ One Protester Claims — Satirical Journalism from Bohiney.com Scene: Disneyland, Anaheim — Where Magic Meets Marxism On July 14, 2025,

100,000 Bureaucrats Give Up Trump's Titanic — White House to Offer Them Lifejackets (But Only if They Quit First) By Chloe Summers, Bohiney Magazine The Mass Federal Exodus Nobody Planned—Except Everyone Did It

Donald Trump's Las Vegas Comedy Residency: A Deep Dive Las Vegas, NV – In a move that has left both political analysts and entertainment critics scratching their heads, former President Donald

Pentagon Hosts "Warrior Speech" Meeting 2025 Generals Clap for PowerPoint Presentations, Forget Who's Who By Clara Olsen – Bohiney.com Satirical News Service | Updated September 27, 2025 Table of Contents Pentagon's Warrior Speech

Biden Declined Musk's Astronaut Rescue Mission Political Calculations, Space Adventures, and the New Frontier of Election Year Strategy In an unexpected twist, the White House decided to block billionaire entrepreneur Elon Musk's

U.S. and Russia Hold Friendly Debate on Ukraine, Mistakenly Call It a Peace Summit Diplomatic success measured in vague platitudes, elaborate handshakes, and the continued existence of missiles in mid-flight. In what

The Panama Canal: The Ultimate Drain’ Meets ‘The Art of the Deal’ From Golden Bridges to Cruise Ship Zones, Trump’s Vision for the Canal Raises Eyebrows—and Oceans. Written in Panama City, Panama,

Trump Announces Mysterious Iran–Israel Ceasefire – Spectators Confused, Both Sides Say ‘What Ceasefire?’ Filed from The Hague, Tehran, Tel Aviv, and a Texas golf cart shaped like a peace dove By: The

FDA Discovers What Food and Drugs Actually Are After 115 Years — Medical Community Demands Investigation Federal Agency Realizes Consumable Substances Have Biological Effects Beyond Regulatory Classification Requirements SILVER SPRING, MD —

EXCLUSIVE: Activists Declare Sovereign Aztlán Nation, U.S. Responds with Shrug and Snort By: Staff Writers, Bohiney News Satirical Bureau LOS ANGELES — June 2025 -- In a groundbreaking move that shook zero

Middle School Political Division: How Food Fights Became Partisan Warfare in 2025 When tater tots become campaign issues and ketchup packets turn into political weapons The Great Tater Tot Insurrection at Jefferson

Biden Forgives All Student Loans—Just Kidding, It Was a Typo in an Email From Hopes to Hysterics in One Keystroke In what can only be described as a masterstroke of modern miscommunication,

Karla Sofía Gascón: Netflix's Oscar Darling or Hollywood's PR Nightmare? In the glitzy world of Hollywood, where stars are born and reputations are shattered faster than you can say "box office

Socialists Fail Every Test: Javier Milei Hands Out Failing Grades to His Opponents When Socialist Economics Meets Reality: An F- in Basic Markets Socialists love grand speeches about equality and fairness, but