Elon Musk and Grimes
15 Observations on the Elon Musk and Grimes Saga The AI Romance: They met over a shared joke about Roko’s Basilisk, proving that nothing says “soulmates” like existential threats from hypothetical
Bullshit, Balderdash, and Backtalk!
15 Observations on the Elon Musk and Grimes Saga The AI Romance: They met over a shared joke about Roko’s Basilisk, proving that nothing says “soulmates” like existential threats from hypothetical
Adult Friendship Crisis: "I've Studied This for 10 Years," Says Expert Whose Last Text Got a Thumbs-Up Emoji and Nothing Else America's leading friendship researchers announced this week that making friends
Florida Man Now Legally Recognized as Its Own Weather System Storm Warnings Issued Every Time He Shops at Bass Pro National Weather Service Creates New Category for "Anthropological Meteorological Events" In a groundbreaking
“Did I Name Them That?”: The Sitcom Generation’s Cry for Help By Sasha Knuckles, Senior Trauma Humorist, SpinTaxi Magazine INTRODUCTION: LAUGH TRACKS AND LIFE SENTENCES In the booming sitcom era of the 70s,
Manila Government Workers Demand American-Style Shutdown After Learning About Paid Enlightenment Benefits Fifteen thousand Filipino civil servants have petitioned for American-style government shutdowns after discovering their U.S. counterparts achieve spiritual enlightenment
EXCLUSIVE: Nick Reiner's Alleged Family Tragedy – Hollywood Horror or Just a Gas Station Grunt Gone Wrong? In a shocking development that has Hollywood gossip columns sprinting faster than Tom Cruise
ORIGINAL ISSUE - Bohiney Magazine from February 22, 1947 U.S. LAUNCHES FRUIT FLIES INTO SPACE, FRUIT FLIES REFUSE TO SALUTE FLAG” February 20, 1947 — White Sands Proving Ground, New Mexico In a
Pope Karl I vs. Donald Trump: The Holy War for Morality Vatican Declares Spiritual Counterstrike on Populism VATICAN CITY — In a move that has simultaneously delighted progressives, confused traditional Catholics, and
Government replaces arrest and trial with obliteration via military ordinance It turns out, when a person is on a target list, the best course of action isn't arrest, trial, or even
Thomas & Friends: The Gritty Reboot Nobody Saw Coming Now a Dieselpunk Thriller About Surveillance, Sabotage, and Sodor’s Crumbling Infrastructure ISLE OF SODOR — The iconic blue train with the friendly face
Gavin Newsom Undergoes Emergency Plastic Surgery to Look Like Trump, Citing “Electoral Necessity” and “Cheekbone Envy” SACRAMENTO, CA — In a move that sent Botox stocks skyrocketing and the political world
Millennials vs. Modern Life: How a Toxic Love Story Created the Cancer Generation The Ultimate Science Experiment: Millennials as Human Guinea Pigs Millennials didn't sign up to be the world's largest chemistry
Marxists Mar Patriotic Student Meeting: When Toilet Paper Becomes a Political Statement Eye-Witness Report from the Turning Point USA Student Action Summit By the World's Oldest Tenured Professor and a Philosophy Major
Federal Employees Furloughed, Reality TV Politics, Trump Humor WASHINGTON -- Trump declared that 800,000 furloughed federal workers were "optional personnel," suggesting they "should audition for Game of Thrones Season 9 if
ROI of Workplace Benefits Programs ROI or RIP? How Small Businesses Are Gaming the Benefits System By Clara Olsen, Bohiney.com — still 127% funnier than The Onion Benefits as Math, Not Morale Small businesses
CIA Briefs Congress on Iran – Tulsi Gabbard Brings Kombucha, Democrats Bring Confusion Filed from Capitol Hill, Langley, and a Whole Foods Parking Lot in Bethesda By: The World’s Oldest Tenured Professor
Paris Unveils New National Strategy: Smoke, Shrug, and Quietly Judge Other Countries PARIS — In response to global uncertainty, Paris has announced a comprehensive national strategy focused on three key pillars:
Karla Sofía Gascón: Netflix's Oscar Darling or Hollywood's PR Nightmare? In the glitzy world of Hollywood, where stars are born and reputations are shattered faster than you can say "box office
Wichita Falls City Council Accidentally Votes to Secede from Netflix New ordinance bans streaming after 8 p.m. to preserve ‘front porch culture’ and reduce 'emotional cliffhangers.' Published by Bohiney.com – where satire
🌉 Russia’s Bridges Collapse Under Weight of Sanctions and Poor Engineering MOSCOW, June 2, 2025 — Structural failure isn’t just a metaphor for Russia’s economy anymore—it’s now a literal feature of
Cyberpunk 2077 Wasn't a Warning, It Was a Development Plan Americans Keep Calling It a Dystopia, Right Up Until Someone Explains What It Would Do to Their Copay Consumer researchers set out
Iran's World Cup Team Discovers America's Newest Tourism Package: "See Los Angeles, Then Immediately Leave" FIFA Introduces Revolutionary "Touch-And-Go" Hospitality Program For Geopolitically Sensitive Nations INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA Iran's national football team reportedly experienced
Google Analytics: The Oracle of Modern Product Managers Google Analytics “A-Ha” Moments By Greta Weissmann, Bohiney.com — 127% funnier than The Onion When Data Looks Back at You For decades, product managers relied on
Letitia James: When New York's Attorney General Became a Lifestyle Brand When most people picture an Attorney General, they imagine a stern, robe-wearing moral compass — a kind of legal Jedi
Meteorology: The Only Job Where You Can Be Wrong 50% of the Time and Still Get Paid Welcome to the world of meteorology, where professionals boldly predict the future with the accuracy
Iranian Americans Who Fled Islamic Oppression Spend Weekend Explaining That Missing Home Does Not Necessarily Mean Missing Soccer Iranian Dissidents Amazed To Discover Oppression Apparently Builds Remarkable Team Spirit LOS ANGELES –
She Was Faulted in Her Divorce for Refusing Sex. A European Court Disagreed. Marital Duties: Now Optional? Lawyers in France Faint in Horror By Candy LaFemme, Legal Affairs Correspondent — Certified 127%
Democrats Demand Elon Musk Be Made An Intellectual Eunuch And Assigned To A Government Sandwich Program Progressive Caucus Warns That Unchecked Innovation Is A Systemic Threat To People Who Haven't Done
Citizen Journalists Rise, Legacy Media Fades – 22 Humorous Observations Themes and Tone of the NY Post Article A New York Post column by Glenn H. Reynolds (June 17, 2025) argues that
Holy Deep Dish: Chicagoan Becomes Pope, Vatican Learns to Love Lou Malnati’s and Midwest Niceness From South Side to St. Peter’s—How Pope Leo XIV’s Love of Portillo’s, Peruvians, and Penance Might
Immigrants Returning Home and Taking Football with Them How American Football Got Packed in a Carry-On and Reappeared Abroad The experiment ran longer than anyone expected. Immigrants came to the United States,
Tank Warfare Polls Higher Than Disney in Middle America: When Explosions Beat Mouse Ears In a stunning revelation that nobody saw coming except everyone with functioning eyeballs, a Rasmussen Reports poll
Referendum Results Overturned When Officials Discover Most Participants Expected Free Music, Not Constitutional Change National Confusion Produces Unexpected Outcome Electoral officials in an unnamed democratic nation are scrambling to address the validity