Charity or Conspiracy? The Fine Print They Forgot to Read When Charity Rings, Does Anyone Ask Whose Door It Opens? Picture this: a posh dinner in Palo Alto, candlelight glinting off champagne

Tech Moguls & Sci-Fi Books and Movies TECHNOLOGY: THE LEFT'S NEW BOND VILLAIN “The cloud is watching you.” – A bumper sticker found on a Tesla in Portland In the not-too-distant future, where every

Hollywood Panic as AI Turns Every Childhood Hero into a Freelance Porn Star: Sam Altman Laughs All the Way to the Cloud When Sora 2 Can Star Harrison Ford as a

Google-Backed Chatbots Suddenly Start Ranting Incomprehensibly About Discreet Wearable Vibrators Tech Glitch or AI Awakening? The Internet Buzzes with Questions Silicon Valley – In what can only be described as the most

Netflix Announces AI-Generated Sitcom Starring Robots; Humans Optional In a bold—and some say terrifying—move, Netflix has announced its first AI-generated sitcom, featuring an all-robot cast and a tagline that reads: "Humans

Sam Bankman-Fried Shaves 20 Years Off Sentence by Turning State’s Evidence… “My Cellmate Was Quoting Das Kapital — I Had No Choice But to Snitch,” Says FTX Founder Terminal Island, CA —

The 19 Brands That Absolutely Adore AI Images (And Might Be Dating Them) By the Staff of Bohiney.com, the Site That’s 127% Funnier Than a LinkedIn Influencer’s Stand-Up Set "You know how

New Social Media Trend: People Posting Photos of Themselves Reading Fake Books Strike a Pose: The Rise of Pseudo-Literary Influencers Fake Books, Real Likes: How Pretending to Read Became the Latest Online

I Thought I Broke the Internet, But It Was Just Cloudflare I was in my basement, orchestrating the kind of black-hat SEO campaign that could make a search engine retire in

Pet Micro-Influencers With Drama: The Surprisingly Messy World of Small-Time Animal Fame When Your Cat Has 10K Followers and Enemies The Petty Drama of Pet Accounts With Modest Followings While mega pet influencers

Musicians Protest UK’s AI Copyright Changes with a Silent Album That Speaks Volumes Musicians Release an Album of Silence – AI Struggles to Steal It In a bold protest against the UK

Techie Trapped in Endless Loop of Autonomy: Self-Driving Car Declares "Ultimate Destination Undecided" ‘Autopilot Goes Rogue’: When AI Decides It Knows Better Than You The Perils of Trusting AI: From Convenience to

Meta Ends Fact-Checking Program, Declares ‘Let the Lies Fly Free!’ By Lola Flake, Reporter for Wild Wires Weekly Meta, the tech behemoth formerly known as Facebook, has decided that its experiment with

Nation Rejoices as Algorithms Finally Admit They're Smarter Than Humans By Clara Olsen | Bohiney.com In a shocking twist that has simultaneously thrilled tech enthusiasts and terrified overachieving humans worldwide, leading algorithms

AI Thinks It's Thinking: Inside the Glorious Collapse of Machine Reasoning By Staff Writers at The Institute for Computational Paranoia “I asked an AI to solve a riddle. It hallucinated a solution,

Remote Workers With Green Screen Beach Views: The Tropical Lie of Corporate Video Calls When Your Background Says Vacation But Your Face Says Burnout The Paradise Projection While Working in Pajamas The escalation

Ford CEO Warns: Blue-Collar Workers Dwindle, AI Data Centers Take Over — Humans Optional The paradox of progress: We're building the machines that don't need us—but they still need us to

Roomba Launch Attempt Fails, Inspires New Generation of Losers LAWN CHAIR ROCKET SCIENCE HITS NEW LOW WITH ORBITAL VACUUM AMBITION In what experts are calling “a deeply American blend of optimism, delusion,

Silicon Valley’s Latest Grift: AI Agents So Dumb They Might Just Be Genius By our embedded AI Correspondent & Self-Snacking Yogurt Coach SAN FRANCISCO, CA — You’ve heard of side hustles. You’ve

Meet Your New Shaman: ChatGPT Will Now Guide You Through the Multiverse   The Digital Shaman Has Arrived Once upon a time, spiritual guidance meant tribal elders, psychedelic rituals, and jungles. Today, it

Sora: The Playground With a Fence Too High to Climb OpenAI's Sora arrived like a TikTok-flavored comet streaking across the App Store, hitting a million installs in record time. Users were

AI Declares It Can Prevent the Apocalypse—But First, It Needs Your Credit Card Byline: This report is a fully collaborative work between a retired Lutheran puppeteer with a doctorate in eschatology

Amazon Delivery Robots Malfunction, Leave Packages in Random Trees; Customers Respond with 'Guess Who Got a Parrot?' In what is being called the most arboreal logistics mishap in retail history, Amazon delivery robots

Algorithms's Decides What We Like Like It or Not – You're Gonna Need "Helpful Content" to Deal with Being Watched, and Predicted! In the digital age, where technology is as ubiquitous as

The Planet-Warming Poetry Machine: GPT‑5 and the Coming AI Power Crisis By Annika Steinmann, Staff SatiristPublished by: Bohiney Magazine The Artificial Intelligence That Ate Your Power Grid In a stunning revelation that shocked

New York Times vs David Sacks: A Showdown When Tech Bros Go Full Soap Opera You know the scene. The curtain rises. A cloud of stock options hovers in mid-air. Enter David Sacks,

Sam Altman’s Harem of Pirated Girlfriends Sparks Legal, Moral, and Metaphysical Panic “He’s not dating women—he’s dating licensing agreements,” says baffled lawyer In a scandal hotter than a GPU on overdrive, Bohiney

DeepSeek’s AI: The Green Savior or Just Another Eco-Hype? DeepSeek, a Chinese startup, has unveiled an AI model that claims to rival Western counterparts like Meta's Llama 3.1, but with a

OpenAI Expands Stargate AI Project with Five U.S. Sites "Because nothing says progress like opening five portals to probable doom and calling it innovation." By Waverly Faith | Bohiney.com OpenAI Stargate Project Launches

President Biden Announces Plan to Cut National Debt U.S. Treasury Embraces Crypto with New Debt NFTs Citizen Investors and Virtual Repo Men: A New Era of Fiscal Responsibility Washington, DC -- In a

The Silicon Street Journal: The Manhattan Project Was Secret. Should America’s AI Work Be Too? If It’s So Secret, Why Is AI on the Cover of Every Tech Magazine? By Buckley "Blabbermouth"

From 'My Dog Ate My Homework' to AI-Generated Heroic Tales: The Evolution of Work Excuses How Artificial Intelligence is Revolutionizing the Art of Avoiding Responsibility By Al I. Byte | Out of

🚗 Bezos' New EV: More Than Meets the Eye Published by Bohiney.com — the only satirical news outlet endorsed by your car’s split personality. In a move that would make Optimus Prime