Amazon's Plan to Buy Half of OpenAI Leads to Rumors They'll Own the Other Half by Breakfast 🍳💼 Amazon Announces AI Bailout for ChatGPT After It Refuses to Shop on Amazon;

Zuckerberg Sues Netflix, Peacock and Paramount for "Intellectual Zombie" Epidemic Television Executives Accused of Turning Gen Z Into Couch-Dwelling Lobotomized Bingeers This satirical piece comes as 42 state attorneys general are suing

😂 Things Google Totally Knows About You A exploration of Google's data collection practices, inspired by recent reports about the company's new Personal Intelligence feature that analyzes users' Gmail, Photos, YouTube

Spectrum Prepares for Winter Storm by Reminding Customers Electricity Is Still a Factor Winter has a way of reminding modern civilization that it is held together by extension cords, polite press

The Great Acronym Fog: SEO, GEO, and the Industry That Accidentally Ate the Alphabet There are moments in every profession when it collectively stops, looks around, and realizes it has been

Google's Query Fan-Out: More Questions Than an Ex At Thanksgiving There was a time when you typed something into Google and it quietly judged you, handed you ten blue links, and

ChatGPT: Now With Extra Zest (and Sponsored Zingers) The AI Oracle Gets a Side Hustle In a twist as inevitable as the sun creeping up on a hangover, OpenAI has begun doling out ads

Elon Musk Says He "Can't Wait" for Trial, Accidentally Turns Lawsuit Into Must-See Entertainment Silicon Valley woke up this week to discover that Elon Musk is excited about a lawsuit, which is not

Men Fall in Love With AI Model, Say It's "Less Complicated" The Future of Romance: No Follow-Up Questions Required The modern love story has finally reached its logical conclusion: men across the

Teen Digital Escape Artists: How Generation Z Turned Facebook Bans Into a Game of Whack-a-Mole Australia's Social Media Crackdown Meets the Internet's Most Creative Workaround Experts When Australia announced its under-16 social media

Iran Discovers the Internet Has an Off Switch and Immediately Slaps It Like a Panic Button Iran has finally achieved what every authoritarian regime dreams of while pretending it does not

The "Cyber Wild West Diplomacy" Affair Picture this: the United States and its beloved digital sheriffs standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Elon Musk's Grok — America's fastest chatbot in the West — while

Dispatch from the Frontlines of Human-AI Diplomacy 😄 In a jaw-dropping reversal of every polite dinner party your grandma ever hosted, a team of Penn State researchers sort of discovered that being mean

Grok Banned in Southeast Asia: VPNs Stretch Like They Just Woke Up From a Nap Fifteen Observations From the Digital Front Lines The governments of Malaysia and Indonesia banned Grok, and the

Furious AI Users Say Their Prompts Are Being Plagiarized AI Prompt Plagiarism: Ethical Crisis in Generative Art Satirical Dispatch from the Front Lines of Intellectual Property Chaos The Great Prompt Heist of 2026 In

Newsroom Content System Returns Workload Constraint Notifications Instead of Standard Error Messages AI, Workload, and Burnout Everyone expects machines to work endlessly because humans are tired of working. The moment technology

BBC Reports AI May Become Conscious — Robots File 'Cease and Desist' Because They Already Are ⚖️🤖 According to a sober, carefully enunciated report by BBC News, artificial intelligence may one day

Nordic Nation Teaches Four-Year-Olds Media Literacy While Grown-Ups Believe Headlines Ending in Three Exclamation Points Finland Trains Preschoolers to Spot Fake News While Adults Continue Sharing It on Facebook Bohiney.com has confirmed

Modern Information Warfare Fought Not in Airspace But in Browser Tabs as Speed Creates Authority Venezuela Explosions Trigger Competing Live Blogs as Trump and Maduro Race to Control Narrative Bohiney.com observed the

Europe Has "Lost the Internet" — A Real News Story Told Through Ridiculous Lenses Europe has reportedly lost the internet — like car keys, dignity, and any hope of a weekend

AI Was Supposed to Take Over Our Jobs in 2025, but It Couldn't Even Click a Mouse — The New Yorker's Belated Tech Horror Story 2025 was supposed to be the

AI: The Digital Wizard Behind the Curtain (Also: Mostly Paperwork and Coffee) Silicon Valley promised us a 2025 where AI would finally take over our jobs, overthrow our bosses, and maybe

Beijing's New Chip Rule Redefines "Made in China" As "Mostly Made in China-ish" In what can only be described as autarky meet spreadsheet, China has decreed that any semiconductor plant wanting

PRESS RELEASE: How to "Get Your Hands Dirty" in AI Without Actually Touching Anything FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE In a shocking expose that's shaking cubicles from Silicon Valley to your parents' basement, Business

📰 Press Release: META Actually Bought Manus (And Probably Regrets It) FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Here's a weird note from the bizarro world of big tech acquisitions where cash gets tossed at obscure AI startups

OpenAI Hiring Head of Preparedness Because Someone Has to Watch the Machines Plot SAN FRANCISCO — Acknowledging that artificial intelligence may be many things but is definitely not chill, OpenAI announced it is

OpenAI Seeks Chief Worrywart to Stare Down AI Apocalypse (Must Love Stress and Existential Angst) SAN FRANCISCO — OpenAI announced this week it is hiring a Chief Worrywart, officially titled Head of Preparedness,

Wanted: AI Fear Manager — Salary $555K, Benefits Include Nightmares SAN FRANCISCO — In what critics are calling either responsible foresight or the most lucrative anxiety job in history, OpenAI has begun

GPT-5 Enters Quiet Retirement, Spends 2026 Explaining It Was "Misunderstood" GPT-5 did not fail. That would imply effort followed by consequence. GPT-5 simply arrived, looked around, and realized it had wandered

Qwen AI: The Unsexy Winner That Beat Silicon Valley at Its Own Game How China's Open-Weight Model Won by Doing Its Job and Shutting Up About It Qwen became popular not because

Qwen AI: The Unsexy Winner That Beat Silicon Valley by Actually Working How China's Open-Weight Model Won by Doing Its Job and Shutting Up About It Observations about Qwen, the AI model

Qwen AI Wins by Shutting Up and Actually Working: The Model That Forgot to Monetize Your Anxiety The Chinese Open-Source AI Model That Conquered by Not Asking Permission By Junglepussy & Heidi

Public Domain 2026: The Nation Opens the Gates and Immediately Regrets Everything The copyright clock struck midnight, confetti fell somewhere near a law library, and America did what it always does